Unlikable actors take all the love out of Paris

If you don't like the new film From Paris with Love, you had better pull out your wallet right now and make sure your ID says you're a U.S. citizen, because this film is nothing but star-spangled, terrorist killing, French hating, goatee wearing American pride.  It's the cinematic equivalent of a Hummer with both "Support our Troops" and "No Fat Chicks" bumper stickers on it.  John Travolta kicks so much terrorist/foreigner butt, he probably had to change out his American made work boots ten times during the shooting of this film cause they were getting so worn down from all the butt kicking!!!

But seriously, From Paris With Love would have made more sense if it had been a co-production between Maxim magazine and the U.S. State Department.  Like a live action Team America: World Police (minus any notion of satire), From Paris is a message to the world to watch out, because despite our crumbling economy and quickening loss of political might, America is still a force to be reckoned with. Jonathan Rhy-Meyers stars as James Reese, a weasly Ambassador's aide who, when not playing chess with his diplomat boss or hooking up with his "supa hot" girlfriend, works for the CIA.  During the first five minutes of the film, Rhy-Meyer's anti-charisma is so overwhelming it seemed like he might actually be the film's bad guy. Luckily, the producers hired veteran actor John Travolta to liven things up a bit.

Travolta plays hard as nails Special OPs agent Charlie Wax, who is introduced as an obnoxious loud mouth who yells racial slurs and chugs energy drinks, and then only gets less likable from there.  Reese, the whiny rookie, has been assigned to escort Wax around Paris and assist in his mission, which consists of making a scene everywhere they go and shooting lots and lots of ethnic people.  First they're after Chinese coke dealers, so Travolta gets to use all sorts of words that haven't been said in polite company since the forties.

Charlie Wax is a big obnoxious musclebound cowboy, basically a personification America's foreign policy during Bush II's administration, who's idea of diplomacy is making threats before you start shooting.  After he's killed every Chinese person he can find in Paris (and done all their coke), Wax suddenly reveals that the Chinese coke dealers were just a way to get to the real enemy, Pakistani terrorists!

From Paris with Love portrays anyone who is not a white male with a goatee as evil incarnate. Asians, French, Pakistanis, and women are all revealed to be America hating psychos who deserve nothing more than a bullet in the brain.  Wax isn't just a casual xenophobic misogynist, he is the living embodiment of what is wrong with modern American masculinity. 

Both Reese and Wax are so detestably unlikable that by the time From Paris wraps up its "bros before hos" moral message, it feels like they were made for each other, since nobody else on Earth could tolerate their company for more than a minute.